So I decided to do a case study each week for autism acceptance month, because I think it’s really interesting to look at like, autism acceptance IN REALITY and what it really means, and some of the examples do kind of make me think and reflect!

E has been diagnosed autistic, and in the process of unmasking, has started to wear clothes that make him more comfortable. He has always hated the weight and rough texture of denim, and any tops with buttons. He likes to wear joggers and baggy tops and now wears these regularly. He also has started using fidget toys and wearing a sunflower lanyard. His partner says to him ‘its great you’re able to get reasonable adjustments, and PIP, but don’t you think you’re taking it all a bit far?’.

I have often been told by people close to me this question, sometimes about myself, or about others, e.g. ‘don’t you think she’s putting it on a bit, exaggerating her autism?’. I also find myself wondering if I am ‘putting it on’, and just not trying hard enough to fit in. I sometimes feel like, I managed before, so is me doing self care things or asking for adjustments, etc, just me ‘giving in’. I’ll end up feeling really guilty. I think this is what makes the process of unmasking so hard..you bully yourself. It’s really hard to ACCEPT YOURSELF.
Just because you ‘managed before’ does not mean you you should have to keep on ‘managing’. Were you happy before? And even if you were – your needs change. Life is more complex as you get older, too.

What do you think? Do you relate to the inner struggle to accept yourself? What has ‘unmasking’ been like for you?
I’m trying to not be ashamed of using fidgets and needing rests after social situations, and to not be angry at myself when I need to spend more to get a taxi because I can’t handle public transport, etc.

In my illustration I tried to show some examples of the tools/adaptions you might use to help manage your differences over daily life, that may change how you look to people. Fidget toys help me calm down or get out energy in stressful/anxiety-provoking situations, and wearing a sunflower lanyard or some kind of sunflower apparel makes people aware of my difference. I’ve also found noise cancelling headphones so beneficial to block out noise and stimuli when I need to escape. Similarly with tinted glasses in terms of blocking out bright lights, though I don’t personally struggle with this.